Just a Pill

Today the Senate Judiciary Committee starts hearings on Neil Gorsuch, who has been nominated by the Pussy-Grabber-In-Chief to be the vote on the Supreme Court that finally overturns Roe v Wade. While Dems in the Senate try to get to the well-concealed facts about Judge Neil, we thought it would be a good time to spread a few actual facts about abortion and birth control.

But first, here’s a little known reproductive fact about potential conservative Supreme Court Justices–they aren’t really born. They’re hatched in rightwing think tanks like the Heritage Foundation. Then, they spend their entire pre-SCOTUS lives in total darkness.   

That means that, despite being sent to the finest law schools, clerking for other Justices, and serving as appellate court judges, they very carefully and very intentionally leave little or no paper trail of writings or decisions on abortion-related issues. That way when their Senate Judiciary Committee hearings come up, their obvious hostility to reproductive rights isn’t hung around their necks like a misogynistic albatross.

Sure enough, Judge Gorsuch has been the ideal stealth justice-in-waiting. His views on abortion have to be surmised from things like his opinions on assisted suicide. That way you technically don’t know for sure what you’re getting until it votes to take your control over your own body away from you.

It’s similar to the campaign of lies and misinformation about the science around birth control and abortion. When anti-choice nutjobs say that certain methods of birth control like the IUD and the Plan B pill are forms of abortion, they’re just plain wrong. And we mean “wrong” as in scientifically, factually, welcome-to-reality WRONG.

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In fact, it’s plain and simple enough that we were able to put it into cartoon form. Check it out here. It’s all in an easy-to-swallow format that you can enjoy while Senate Republicans try to ram Neil Gorsuch down your throat.

 

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Let’s Be the Generation That Ends Hyde #BeBoldEndHyde

Have you watched our new video about the history of the Hyde Amendment? Have you shared it with everyone in your life? Learn more and take action at AllAboveAll.org.

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TRAP Law 101 Class

The biggest abortion case in 23 years is going before the U.S. Supreme Court on March 2nd and most people have absolutely no idea it’s happening! This decision will greatly effect access to abortion. Let me repeat. THIS DECISION WILL GREATLY AFFECT ACCESS TO ABORTION!

The case, Whole Woman’s Health V. Hellerstedt, will review a type of abortion regulation known as TRAP laws. (TRAP stands for Targeted Regulation of Abortion Providers!) TRAP laws unfairly regulate clinics with an end-goal of shutting them down.

TRAP law examples include: requiring abortion doctors to obtain admitting privileges at a nearby hospital (i.e. a woman needs a note from her local hospital —> many of which will not give “permission”) and mandate that abortion facilities meet the requirements of ambulatory surgical centers. More dangerous than abortions (statistically speaking, if you are into facts and those sort of things) is getting your wisdom teeth pulled. Do those facilities need to meet the standards of a surgical center?! No, they do not. (When they find teeth in a women’s vagina maybe they will start regulating dentists.)

What all this means is that although abortion is technically legal, restrictions on clinics make it nearly impossible and incredibly expensive to keep a clinic open. TRAP laws, mandatory waiting periods, and abortion bans are leaving women with fewer options and more challenges that ever for seeking abortions. Taking all of these different restrictions into account (a total of 49 states have compromised abortion access since 1973 when abortion became a legal constitutional right) we see the message to women loud and clear “YEAH YOU CAN HAVE AN ABORTION – GOOD LUCK TRYING TO FIND A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN GET ONE!”

SOOOOOOO for the month of February we here at Lady Parts Justice League are dropping a video a week explaining TRAP Laws and what is at stake. Think of it as a TRAP LAW 101 Class in the form of our favorite mode of expose —> POP CULTURE REFERENCES!!!

Today we are releasing our second video of the month showcasing America’s favorite pastime: reality shows about houses! Fixing houses! Finding new houses! Where in my house can I take away women’s right?! Wait, what….

So why is finding a home easier than getting a healthcare procedure?! Oh yeah, because of TRAP Laws! This is not your nana’s house huntin’! Follow Susan as she figures out what abortion clinic best fits with her finances and needs. It’s an abortion adventure on a budget. Check out ‘Clinic Hunters’!

P.S. Comparing women’s reproductive rights to reality shows about houses feels really creepy! IT’S TIME FOR US ALL TO BE SO CREEPED OUT that we get out there and say ‘NO MORE’! Pay attention, get your panties in a knot, vote, vote, vote, make noise, join the Lady Parts Justice League!

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Dealing With Shame. Guest Blogger: Pete Lee (Comedian and Masturbation Survivor)


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I want to share my masturbation story. It’s not a story with a happy ending… despite what masturbation advocates may tell you. No, the real story of masturbation is one of shame… shame, confusion, and an overwhelming sense of regret.

You don’t feel the shame right away after your masturbation. There are too many conflicting emotions. You just want to forget what you just did to yourself… and to the precious life that you ejected from your testicles.

But soon enough, it hits you. Everything seems to remind you of your masturbation. The laughter of young children at a playground just torments you with thoughts of your wasted sperm–sperm that will never get the chance to laugh and play on a swingset.

Hollywood glamorizes masturbation. In our permissive society, it’s just something that people do if they’re “hip” or “cool.” But they don’t talk about the messy aftermath of a masturbation… and the stains that never go away.

I want young men who are thinking about masturbating, or who may be masturbating right now, to picture me when they do it. I want them to think about what I did to myself, to picture me doing it. Maybe, just maybe, that will make them stop what they’re doing. If it does, then everything is worth it.

When you perform a masturbation, you’re not thinking of the years of shame and remorse that are going to follow. The men in this video certainly weren’t. And now they’re sorry. Listen to their stories, think about mine–and make your own decision. I pray it’s the right one.

 

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LPJ League’s “Do It Dudes” Do Abortion

It’s TRAP law Wednesday and that means it’s the day the Lady Parts Justice League releases a new video to raise awareness about TRAP laws —  the insidious anti-abortion regulations extremists are inserting into legislation all over the country. These laws result in closing down clinics and making access to abortion almost impossible for the most vulnerable.

Texas state senator Wendy Davis famously stood for 13 hours fighting them in 2013 but, alas, Texas held ‘em. Altogether, 24 states have passed these laws. But now, a Texas-based clinic is taking Wendy’s fight all the way to the Supreme Court.

On March 2nd, the Court will hear oral arguments in Whole Woman’s Health v. Hellerstedt, the biggest abortion case to reach SCOTUS in over 24 years. This case could change the face of abortion access in this country forever…and most people don’t even know that these laws exist or that this case is happening. So it’s a Big Fucking Deal.

ENTER the Lady Parts Justice League.

We are trying to drop knowledge leading up to the SCOTUS case through videos explaining these terrifying laws through our signature satirical lens.

This week, we put a twist on Buzzfeed’s “Try Guys,” the hit video series about three guys trying their hand at everything from UFC fighting to K-Pop dance moves. Our “Do It Dudes,” a similar trio of cis guys, use this whacky approach to show the difficulty in accessing something really real…like an abortion.

After all, what better way to explain the obstacles of abortion access in the United States than by showing what happens when dude-bros try to get an abortion. AMIRITE?!

So after you have a good laugh on us, get angry and visit our TRAP laws page to learn more about this shit-fuckery and what you can do to help #StopTheSham.

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Watch LPJ League’s Tour of “Darbi’s Dream Clinic”

Lady Parts Justice League has spent February launching videos to highlight the problems with TRAP laws. Our final video in this series satirizes America’s favorite 11-inch, independent plastic woman in “Darbi’s Dream Clinic.”

Why Darbi? Well, let us tell ya…

In 2013, then Texas Senator Wendy Davis legendarily filibustered Texas TRAP laws for 13 hours. Those TRAP laws were later passed, but now they’re being challenged before the Supreme Court. On March 2nd, the Court will hear arguments in the Whole Woman’s Health v. Hellerstedt case, the most important abortion case in the past quarter century. Unfortunately, the lower court decision upheld the TRAP laws, so if the Scalia-less SCOTUS deadlocks 4-4, the outlook for clinics in Texas is still dire.

Wendy Davis’ fight against these laws had extremists destroying her private life, threatening her safety and publicly trying to shame her by referring to her as, “Abortion Barbie.”

In this video, LPJL decided to flip the script on that moniker by celebrating the idea of Abortion Barbie with our inspiring doll, “Darbi” who runs the best clinic in the world! One that is free of those burdensome and unnecessary TRAP laws that harm both clinics and patients!

We say, “Go, Darbi, Go!”

To learn more about the TRAP laws in this video, the case going before the Supreme Court, and how it affects YOU and your state, check out our TRAP laws page to learn more!

Watch more Lady Parts Justice League videos on Youtube.